Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
you win again, gameday.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
