I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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