sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
