she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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