So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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