Best friends brother. Beat that.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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