come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
