I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I'm bleeding and have questions
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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