Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I am midnight drunk by noon
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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