If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
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