so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
