Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
