I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize
