sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
