Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
