I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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