Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
