his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
