It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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