haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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