We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I think i got beer on your cat.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
