ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
