Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
