Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize