have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
