Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Randomize
