a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
