Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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