How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
