i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
