dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
