yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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