matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
should my penis look like a turkey
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
It was like giving head to a cactus.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
