am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize