Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
