yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
