with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize
