Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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