So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Randomize
