addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Randomize