Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
