My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
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