my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
