We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Naked. naked and bneed help.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
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