Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize