She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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