You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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