So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
just tell him i said nine months
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
