pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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