I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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